Just like every other Sundays my buddies and I go out for dinner and a movie. On that fateful day we were going watch Herbie. Before the movie started I thought to myself that the movie must suck, badly. I was assuming this because in the whole cinema there were only the 5 of us and a family of 4 just a couple of rows in front of us.
The cinema was exceptionally cold so I put my feet on the chair in a squatting position. Then all of a sudden from deep down in my bowels there were movements. A piece of shit must have shifted. The gas from the Pepsi I drank while having dinner at KFC was trying to get out. I did what I did best while in public and the following conversation took place.
Fawked: I need to fart
Sammi: do it
Luk Got: why so little people in cinema
Roxy: I’m going check out the twin seats to see if they are comfy
Fawked: Guys I really need to fart
Match: This movie is going suck
Fawked: I can’t hold it anymore…
*POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT*
Fawked: AHHHHHHHHHHHH, THAT FELT GOOOOOOD
Luk Got: what the hell!?
Sammi: what the…
Match: holy shit…
Roxy: WAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA
Match: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
Luk Got: HAHAHAHHA, HELP I CANNOT BREATH
Sammi: HAHAHAHHA
I swear that was the longest fart ever. It must have lasted a good 7 seconds and the sound was thunderous in the empty and quiet cinema. Just before I let it rip a couple was looking for their seat 2 rows in front of us. Just as the lady was staring at us I farted. She couldn’t stop laughing so her husband had to bring her out of the cinema. We had a good laugh that lasted for like 15 minutes I think. Luk Got almost had a cardiac arrest.
A movie should be made bout me farting in the cinema, it would be so much better than Herbie. That’s how much that little beetle sucked. The only good thing worth watching in the movie was Lindsay Lohan. While watching the movie I noticed everybody wanted to give her a hug. So what’s wrong with that? Nothing is wrong, it’s just that she has some huge cans. Michael Keaton played her dad, and he must have hugged her about 20 times and each time he had that stupid look on his face. Anyway enough about Lindsay Lohan’s boobs. That movie sucked. Must avoid at all cost.
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