I take back all the bad things I said about The Book of Eli. I take it all back. Alice in Wonderland wins hands down as the worst fucking movie ever made in the entire universe. I had to sit through 1 hour and 48 minutes of pure shit.
I don’t know what the fuck is up with Tim Burton, recently he makes shitty gray scale movies. Everything is dark and gothic. And it’s always starring Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter. Helena Bonham Carter starred in all 3 of his latest movies and Johnny Depp starred in the last 2.
The cinema was filled with kids, at least they enjoyed it thoroughly. The kids were always giggling and laughing and clapping when something good happened. I wanted to sleep but I couldn’t because I was so pissed at the movie I wanted to rip my chair out to throw at the screen.
Johnny Depp played the Mad Hatter. He wasn’t very entertaining in the movie. Johnny Depp is a really good actor. I always enjoyed watching his characters. But in Alice in Wonderland, even Johnny Depp couldn’t save it.
Mia Wasikowska starred as Alice. She is not hot. She was boring. But then again, they even fucked up the movie’s only saviour; Anne Hathaway.
This is probably the first movie Anne Hathaway didn’t go nude. But even if she went nude looking like that, I wouldn’t be interested. That is actually a very flattering screen cap of Anne. She looks a lot worse in other scenes.
The only part that entertained me lasted only for about 15 seconds and that was Hatter’s Futterwaken dance. I have conveniently included the video here for you. Enjoy.
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