Fawked Network

Before you continue reading I must warn you that it contains spoilers.

Last Sunday me and my buddies went for Shinjuku Incident at the cinema. I can’t decide if the movie was bad or very bad. The first half of the movie was quite good. I actually thought at that time that the movie was going to be great. Those that have watched it warned me against watching Shinjuku Incident because they said Jackie Chan wasn’t fighting his usual Kung Fu because he’s a gangster head. So I asked if there was any fighting and nobody could give me a straight answer. Well after watching it I can tell you that he gets into very little fights, more like street fights.

Long story short, Jackie Chan goes to Japan for a better life and to look for his girlfriend, played by Xu Jinglei. Once he’s there he meets up with his brother (I think more like his buddy, I’m not sure. The whole movie was in Japanese and Mandarin and I can’t understand both). His brother is played by Daniel Wu. Daniel shows him around and helps him get odd jobs. Basically they do the shit jobs like picking garbage and cleaning shit from the sewers. Then Jackie saves his fine piece of ass played by Fan Bing Bing. Fan Bing Bing falls for Jackie but Jackie is still fantasizing about his former girlfriend that is already married to a Yakuza. I don’t know what’s his name, some Japanese guy I think.

Now, the stupid thing about this movie is after Jackie saves the Yakuza guy from an attempted assassination, the Yakuza guy asks Jackie to kill 2 person for him. Jackie agrees with the condition that certain areas controlled by a Taiwanese gang be given to him. The Yakuza guy agrees. This is when the movie gets really stupid. The next scene Jackie is in an office room of a Yakuza boss and stabs him in the stomach. That entire scene was like 2 seconds. Everybody in the cinema went like “WTF?”. I could practically see the dialogue cloud appear on top of everyone’s head with the “WTF?”. The next scene he’s at some hotel lobby entrance and Jackie shouts “TOGAWA!”, the said man turns to look at Jackie and Jackie shoots him once or twice. Then about 20 guys opened fire at Jackie while Jackie runs away faster than Usain Bolt. The last person I saw that could survive such gunfire was Rambo. Up till here, I still told myself the movie will get better once he becomes the gangster boss of the Chinese in Shinjuku.

But no! It gets even more stupid. Jackie leaves the gangster business to his buddies and they start dealing drugs and dressing funny. Jackie killed 2 Yakuza bosses and nobody went after him for revenge. If you ask me, Jackie didn’t want to portray himself as a bad guy in the movie. That made the movie suck so much.

I mean come on, the movie would have been so much better if he became the gangster boss and went round beating and killing Yakuza’s or something. I was really disappointed with how the movie went and how it ended. In every stupid movie the last part everybody dies. Jackie’s buddies turn against him and start fighting among themselves. That’s the whole package. You would be cursing at the storyline, the badly edited scenes and you go home feeling like shit cause everybody died and they left their women and children crying.

But it’s not all bad. In Shinjuku Incident we might have found the next Joker to take the part of the now deceased Heath Ledger. And that man is no other than Daniel Wu. Would I watch the movie again? I probably would not. Would I have watched it if I knew it was that bad? I probably would because I enjoyed the first half of the movie.