It looks like nothing is going well for Manchester United this season after they sold Cristiano Ronaldo for £80 million to Real Madrid. With the £80 million, Man United wanted to buy the following players:
Carlos Tevez was on at Manchester United for 2 years. After 2 years of him bitching, Man United decided it was finally time to sign him up for good. Then he decides to be a total ass and join some other shitty team.
David Villa plays for Valencia and his club will not sell him. If they were to sell him, I’m sure he would go to Real Madrid.
Karim Benzema is a 21 year old (now former) Lyon player. Status: SOLD TO REAL MADRID
Ribery is currently contracted to Bayern Munich. But he has stated if he were to leave it would be to REAL MADRID
So there we have it. Every player that Manchester United wants to buy gets snapped up by Real Madrid. When a high profile player leaves, you have to replace him with another high profile player. You have to. It’s to keep the fans happy and of course to fill the gap. Then there is also the issue of being less superior compared to the club that just stole your player. So Manchester United, what is your response? What is the response of the great Sir Alex Ferguson?
After selling their best and most marketable player, they buy this guy called Antonio Valencia. Who the fuck is Antonio Valencia? He used to play for Wigan. Until they bought him recently I never even heard of him. Ok let’s just assume he’s good. He’s young, maybe he can develop into a really good player. Maybe… But he only cost £15 million. So what IS our response to losing the worlds best player? Surely Antonia Valencia can’t be it? This is our response…
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FUCKING OWEN? You can’t be fucking serious. After selling off the hottest properties in football, you reply with signing Michael Owen? A player that even a relegated Newcastle doesn’t want. A player that even England doesn’t want. A player that missed more than half of last season due to injuries. The price tag on Michael Owen was £0. He was the cheapest player on earth. He was so cheap nobody wanted him.
So there we have it. We sold the worlds best player for a world record price. And we bought the worlds best bench warmer for a world record cheap price.
Fuck Manchester United. I’m going to go burn all my Manchester United merchandise, except for my Manchester United cap of course. Because Dawn lost it!
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